Have you ever felt “spanked” by the words you’ve read? That’s the way I felt today as I was reading an advance copy of Deanna Doss Shrodes’ upcoming book, “Uncommon Answers: Partnering with the Holy Spirit to Receive Extraordinarily More.”
Shrodes includes a chapter called “Uncommon Listening” about the power and blessing of listening, especially to our Heavenly Father! As I read about our often-lopsided communication with the Lord, I began to consider the amount of time I talk compared to the amount of time I listen… it’s often lopsided and not just in prayer. In all fairness, I am a teacher, but that doesn’t allow me to abdicate from the very important role of listening more than I talk.
As I spent the afternoon pondering and listening to the Lord’s input, my mind filled with a rapid-fire list of verses to consider:
Proverbs 10:19 “In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, but he who restrains his lips is wise.” NIV
James 1:19b “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry…” NKJV
Matthew 12:35-37 “A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. 36 But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken. 37 For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.” NIV
Note the term “empty” in Matthew 12:36. Oxford defines empty as containing nothing, lacking meaning, without sincerity. It offers the synonyms: worthless, useless, and vain. It makes me think of the modern term “empty calories” referring to foods that do not strengthen you or provide nourishment but instead, they take up room in your stomach that’s needed for life-sustaining foods.
In the same way, our words can be devoid of nourishment. Take a minute and think about the myriad of comments we may make throughout a day that are responses to people or situations (usually annoying ones) that do not bring about encouragement, growth, or change. These may be complaints, sarcastic remarks, or criticisms that may or may not be heard by the person it is directed towards. Maybe our comments are not snide remarks or gossip, maybe they are simply unnecessary comments referring to someone’s quirkiness, something distasteful, or an opinion on someone’s lifestyle. If the comment is heard, more times than not, it won’t inspire change but rather hurt or anger. Regardless, if the words aren’t beneficial, then they are empty.
Other examples of empty words may be found in silly arguments, unsolicited opinions, judgmental remarks, and pointless comments. I find myself making conversation when it’s not necessarily needed or welcome. I’ve offered opinions that were not unkind but also not requested. Times like this are when I need to remember Solomon’s advice that “overtalk shows you up as a fool” and I sure don’t want to be placed in that category (Ecclesiastes 5:3)! Not only that, but I’ve found that sometimes making an innocent comment opens the door for someone to respond in a snide or unkind way. Guarding my words will reduce those opportunities.
As I meditate on these truths, I hear my Father’s loving correction. He designed me to speak nourishing, beneficial words that build up! I’m made with His character and in His image, so my words should be a reflection of His heart! My speech, all believers’ speech, should be filled with grace and seasoned with salt; salt preserves and brings flavor! (Colossians 4:6). Ephesians 4:29 is very clear, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen” (emphasis mine). This is not a suggestion, but a command!
I’ve learned that there is blessing in obedience. When my Daddy speaks to me, I want to listen and obey. Moving forward, this means purposing to listen more than I talk and choosing to avoid empty comments, conversation, and opinions. It also means being more purposeful to build others up, speak life consistently, and declare good things for those in my realm of influence. I’m up for the challenge! How about you?
Live loved!
