Strength for the Struggle

Related imageLife can be exhausting!  At times, I feel like that circus plate spinner… you know who I mean…  The one who has numerous poles with plates on top and runs back and forth between the poles, rotating them in order to keep the plates spinning so they won’t fall and shatter.  My plates are probably similar to yours: family, finances, job, classes, friendships, health, chores, volunteering, etc.  All are valuable and all are demanding!  Mix in a few stressors (conflicts, unexpected expenses, health issues, changes) and we feel like we are one misstep away from plate shattering chaos!

The struggle is real! Some days, the struggle seems too real!  I’m tempted to run someplace safe and curl into a ball with a blanket and pillow and hope that the world will run smoothly without my help.  Am I alone in my urge to hibernate from life??

Sigh… so do I hibernate or put on my big girl pants and keep pressing on?  It’s not really much of a choice, is it?  Life goes on and we either grab ahold and ride along or it will drag us behind it!

I have good news and better news!  The good news (depending on how you look at it) is that the world really does need you and I!  Each of us are valuable, unique, and loved by someone who would not be the same if we chose to hibernate indefinitely!  The better news is that there are ways to help us cope with the chaos that has our heads spinning with those plates! There is strength to be had if we know how to tap into it!

As I have been wrestling with my own sense of plate-spinning panic, I’m realizing that I can make some choices that enable me to not just survive the struggle, but to even thrive in it!

Rest: “Ummm, when am I supposed to rest?” I know, it seems like an impossible feat, right?  But the truth is, if you don’t find time each week to rest, your body will get to the point where you have no choice in the matter.  Rest can be sleep, but it is not the equivalent.  Sleep is physical rest; but your soul needs rest too.  For me, soul rest involves choosing to think about positive concepts, creative ideas, and exciting dreams.  It may include reading a book, crafting, exercising, or chatting with someone I love. It might involve a family adventure or quiet time to write.  No matter what you choose to do, strength is found in giving yourself a “brain break” from the responsibilities that pull at you.

Rejuvenate: Different than rest, rejuvenate is to bring new life to something.  What in your life needs a little rejuvenation?  What dreams have you set aside that need revisited?  What relationships have you put on the back burner that need to become a priority?  Ask yourself what makes your heart jump and infuse some of that into your life again!  If traveling brings you joy but finances and time are a hinderance, take a day trip someplace you haven’t visited before.  If time with friends lights up your world, then arrange a game night soon! Strength is found in rejuvenating dreams.

Relegate: Not everything in our lives is of equal importance.  In fact, the things in our lives demanding the most attention are often not those that are the most valuable.  If I’m not careful, my responsibilities as a teacher can run roughshod over the valuable relationships in my life (FYI: Rarely do teachers accomplish all their work at school, thus the evenings of grading and writing lessons!).  It’s not that my teacher responsibilities are not important, but rather that my family and friends are more important in my life and deserve whole hearted attention.  Sometimes we have to relegate the less important to its proper place!  Take a few minutes to examine your priorities.  If your relationship with the Lord and with the precious people in your life are not at the top, it’s time to relegate!  Strength is found when you say “no” to what may be good so that you can say “yes” to that which matters most!

Redistribute:  This is the opposite of micro-managing!  When you redistribute, you are passing out some of your spinning plates so that you can better focus your time & energy!  It may be time to enlist some help to keep things in order.  My wise friend, Sarah Lehmann, calls herself an “opportunity maker!”  She values teamwork and realizes that there is strength in inviting and enabling others to take ownership in a process, project, or goal.  There’s truth in the statement: “Teamwork makes the dream work.”  So, rewrite the chore list, reduce your volunteering, share the cooking load, say “no” to a request.  Redistribute and you will find strength that enables you to be more effective and find the rest your soul needs.

Remember:  Remember the “why” and the “Who.”  This requires taking a step back and looking at the big picture.  This choice was a big boost for me and I’m thankful for the people in my life who propel me on!  Remember your “why”…  Why are you doing what you are doing?  Is it your calling, your dream, or your family?  Bringing your “why” into focus will help you find the strength to face each day’s demands.  Then, more importantly, remember the “Who”… Who is it that has called you and me and enabled us to do what we are called to do?  When I remember who I am and Whose I am1, I find myself focusing on all the things I am thankful for instead of all the things I can’t control.  It is a shift in thinking from the negative to the positive, from looking inward to looking outward, and from looking around me at the physical realm to looking up into the spiritual realm!

Do you remember who you are and Whose you are?  Write it down and post it on your mirror!  You are a child of the Living God!  You are anointed, enabled, capable, and equipped!  You and I can do everything He has called us to do!

I am grabbing on to this truth today as a face a new school year, in a higher grade level, with a new team, deeper standards, increased expectations, and a different classroom.  I am going to hold onto the truth that I truly can do all things through Christ Who gives me strength (Philippians 4:13)! I will actively pursue these “strength tools” as I navigate this new journey.  I hope you will too!

Lord, I pray that You would bless and strengthen this reader!  Give them wisdom to navigate all that is before them and make choices that allow them to rest as well as fulfill demands.  Enable them to see the people in their lives who will come along side them and help them stand strong.  May they feel your love wrapped around them today!  Thank You, Father!

Live Loved,

Read more encouragement here: I Just Can’t… or Can I? and Life Happens

1All I Need

Favorite Friday: Connection!

“Raindrops on roses

And whiskers on kittens

Bright copper kettles

And warm woolen mittens

Brown paper packages tied up with strings

These are a few of my favorite things…”1

Julie Andrews sang these lyrics as the intrepid Maria, an adult orphan who embraced music to soothe her lonely heart.  As her story unfolds, what a blessing it was to find herself set into a family!  I’d like to imagine that she added a few lyrics to this song…

Sweet, sticky kisses

And warm, cozy cuddles

Laughter and snapshots

And birthdays with candles

Ball games and bike rides, Kids pumping on swings

These are a few of my favorite things…

Connection with family and friends is one of my favorite things!

Connection… authentic, encouraging, enriching connection… is to the soul what nourishing food is to the body!  Authentic connection usually entails sharing,  lots of laughter, heart revelations, and even some tears.  These are times when you know and are known.  You are cared for simply because of who you are instead of what you can do.

Yesterday, I listened as my daughter shared her heart about what God was doing there in the Philippines.  She was facetiming her uncle who she’d not seen or spoken with (aside from the occasional call or text) in a few years.  I watched as he listened and affirmed her.  What a blessing to see authentic connection overcome time and distance!  You and I need these connections for our soul to thrive!Truly connecting with others requires something of us… it requires time, interaction, and vulnerability.

  • Since time is not easily recovered, it is a valuable commodity. We demonstrate value of another person by setting aside time to engage in their lives and build the relationship!
  • Interaction might also be labeled communication. However, some would say communication is the art of listening and talking.  To me, interaction indicates a deeper level of listening, considering, and responding that enhances relationship and increases understanding by engaging the heart, mind, and spirit.
  • While time and interaction might seem like no-brainers, vulnerability is where the brain may slam on the brakes! Relationships can occur with time and even interaction, but they will remain shallow and unfulfilling without vulnerability.  Authentic connection can only occur when vulnerability is present.  What is vulnerability?  Various people may define it differently, but I’d say it’s a bit like peeling back your skin and showing what is truly inside your heart!  Being vulnerable is choosing to say, “This is who I am inside; this is what I need; this is where I hurt; this is what I dream.”  It’s scary and even painful to open yourself up to others because they are human too!  They may not appreciate the gift of you.  So, be wise about the who, what, where, and when of vulnerability.  But don’t be stingy with sharing who you are!  You will only cheat yourself.  Dr. Brené Brown brings clarity to the value of vulnerability in her TED talk and it’s worth a listen!2

Deeply connecting with others can be scary!  It also can seem impossible if you have a tendency to isolate yourself.  However, don’t let that stop you!  If you find that you have few authentic connections in your life, my challenge to you is this:  Don’t wait for others to come to you!  Reach out to someone else, peel back the layers of heart-protection, and engage them in some nourishing interaction!

Just as candy and junk food will not sustain a healthy body, shallow relationships and surface conversation will not sustain a healthy soul.

We need more!  Moving beyond the safety of self-preservation to the satisfaction of heart connection isn’t a guarantee of no pain.  BUT, moving towards heart connection gives more than it takes.  Pressing into authentic relationships with others is a worthwhile, heartwarming, rewarding endeavor.  Others are worth knowing and YOU are worth being known!3

Connection will enrich your life as it has mine!

Live Loved!

 1Lyrics from “My Favorite Things” written by Richard Rogers for The Sound of Music

2The Power of Vulnerability by Dr. Brené Brown: https://youtu.be/iCvmsMzlF7o

3Read more about your value here: You are Enough & Beautiful Mess

Favorite Friday-Dancing Fun!

Yes, you busted me!  It’s actually Saturday!  But yesterday, focusing on my firstborn’s birthday was a priority, so here we are with slightly late Favorite Friday!

I’m not sure what your “religious paradigm” involves, but I was raised in a non-conservative denomination with solid faith foundations that I am very thankful to have embraced.  However, as I explore the difference between Kingdom Culture as evidenced in the life of Jesus, outlined in the Word, and confirmed by the Holy Spirit and America’s version of Christian culture, I realize that much of what I was raised with is definitely rooted in the latter instead of the authentic Kingdom Culture.

I could give you various examples of how historically many cultures have translated Kingdom culture through the lens of their own culture, but I will give you this biblical example:  When the Gentiles joined the rank of believers, the Jews felt that they should be circumcised because that was Jewish law.  However, Paul contended that under the New Covenant, it was a circumcision of the heart God expected, not the physical body (Romans 2).  Physical circumcision was Jewish culture; heart circumcision (spiritual submission to the Lord) is Kingdom culture!

All that to say, that I was raised believing that dancing was not appropriate in the Christian culture unless you were dancing “in the Spirit” (II Sam. 6:14).  Sound familiar?  As I’ve grown as a person and a believer, I understand that while dancing in the Spirit is a very valid (and biblical) act, dancing in and of itself is not wrong either!  I love that!  I love that we can worship the Lord with dance (Psalm 149) and we can also just have fun dancing (Jeremiah 31:4)!  Dancing is healthy for our minds and bodies!1  (Caveat: like anything else, dancing can become negative but that’s not the subject of this blog!)

Then I stumbled upon this song by MercyMe in one of my playlists:

Love it!

“We’ve got reason to get up 
Reason to get down
He done traded our sin for joy
And now, that joy wants out”2

Don’t wait! Play the song and jump out of your chair to dance!

“It’s okay, to cut loose
Oh, it ain’t about how you move, but what moves you
We’re so consumed with what we think we’re supposed to be
That we stop living like we know that we’re free”2

Dance because you are free!

Live Loved,

1Dancing Makes You Feel Better article

2Lyrics from Happy Dance by Mercy Me