Category Archives: Emotional Health

Don’t Write on Yesterday’s Page

Posted on by
4

There’s something exciting about “new.”  Imagine that feeling of popping open the fresh box of pointed crayons, smelling that new car scent, opening an untouched jar of peanut butter, pulling out a new pair of jeans.  New is adventurous!  New is refreshing!  New is an untouched opportunity!

Maybe you’ve heard someone say, “I can’t wait for the new year, I’m ready to be done with this one!”  We celebrate each January 1st as a new beginning and a fresh start. It represents an untouched opportunity to explore, grow, and change.

But why wait?  By waiting for the close of the official calendar to evoke freshness in our lives, we are missing the blessing of each new day!  Too often we wake up in the morning just to have our minds flooded with the happenings of yesterday… missed opportunities, frustrated moments, forgotten commitments, harsh words…  all stains that should stay with yesterday but are allowed to bleed into today.  Don’t begin today by writing on yesterday’s page. Each new day is a new beginning.  You were designed to open to a fresh page when your eyes embrace the morning light!

The Prophet Jeremiah experienced loss, anger, and frustration, yet he reminded himself (and us), “The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is His faithfulness; His mercies begin afresh each morning.” (Lamentations 3:22-23, NLT)

What are these mercies that are new for us each morning?

His faithfulness-Isaiah 30:18, I Thessalonians 5:23-24

His unconditional love-Psalm 103:11, I John 4:9-10

His forgiveness-Micah 7:18-19, I John 1:9

His strength-Isaiah 40:28-31, Philippians 4:13

His grace-Psalm 84:11, Romans 5:20-21

His peace-Psalm 29:11, John 14:27

As you step into your new day, what is it that you need today… His faithfulness, love, forgiveness, strength, grace, peace? All of those things? Me too!  And they are all found in our Savior!  He is never further than a whisper away!  Don’t wait for a new year to gain a fresh beginning; start each day with a new page!

Don’t stop there though, as you experience God’s faithfulness, love, and forgiveness, extend those gifts to the others in your life! Offer forgiveness that isn’t requested; give grace to those who offend; show kindness that is undeserved.  Freely you have received it, so freely give!

Our Father is a God of new beginnings!  He promises to forget our mistakes and help us clean up our messes.  Our eyes and feet point forward because that is how God designed us to move… forward into what He has for us today without clinging to the stains of yesterday.  Let each day unfold on a fresh page, purified and ready to reflect God at work in you and me.

Live Loved, because you are!

Please share your thoughts in the “reply” box or by clicking on the bubble by the title!

Savor the Season!

Posted on by
Reply

It’s the most wonderful time of the year!  November and December usher in wonderful opportunities to reflect on the blessings in our lives as well as the people who make our lives richer!  But as our calendars fill up and our wallets empty, the season seems to slip by much too quickly and on January 2nd, we look in our rearview mirror wondering how it flew by in the blink of an eye!

It feels this way each year for me…  so, I’ve been contemplating…  what can I do, or not do, to treasure the days, value the moments, and capture the pleasure instead of haphazardly racing through the season.

Savor… I’ve decided to purposely savor… savor the preparations, savor the time invested, savor the opportunities, savor the finds, savor the people!

Savoring involves using the 5 senses to experience and appreciate the world around us.

Tasting…  so easy this time of year!  Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa… each involves deliciously prepared foods that we anticipate each year.  But there’s so much more to tasting!  The preparation time and effort going into our food can involve times of cooking together, whipping up cookies with a promising baker, sharing a special recipe with a new family member, inviting the input of someone who usually doesn’t offer it.  Savor the moments of food preparation as well as the food.

Smelling…. Ahhh, at this moment, there’s a caramel pecan candle filling my home with a sense of warmth and delight.  Cinnamon, pine, favorite perfumes, honeyed-ham, all evoking images that bring delight… or maybe not.  Our sense of smell is uniquely connected to our memory.  Sometimes memories can be painful or remind us of loss.  But even those moments have value.  They remind us of past blessings, victories over pain, and anticipation of new memories being made.  Savor the smells and the memories that come with them.

Feeling… Feelings of the heart and feelings of touch are precious opportunities to savor the season!  Whether you live alone or in a houseful of chaos, look for opportunities to encourage others with kind words, thoughtful actions, and genuine affection.  Give to those who don’t expect it and can’t give in return.  Hug instead of shaking hands. Offer soft answers to those whose stress levels push yours.  Savor the opportunities to be a blessing.

Seeing…  We see with our eyes and envision with our mind.  Savor the people in your life with both!  See who they are and who they are destined to be.  Understand that our loved ones do not always show us their kindest moments yet love embraces the person for who they are not for what they do!  Savor the delight on your loved one’s face as they open a gift from you.  Capture a mental snapshot of an unexpected, serene moment. Delight in the splashes of color uniquely displayed during the holidays.  Savor the sights of your eyes and heart.

Hearing… Close your eyes and hone in on the sounds… the laughter, the music, the greetings, the bells.  Choose to tune out the demands on you that seem so urgent—but can wait.  Sift through the must dos and set them aside for some things you choose to do that bring you joy.  Listen to the words of Christmas Carols, focus on the silly stories your children share, laugh at the joke you’ve heard 10 times before, hear the heart of your loved ones, even if their words don’t match.  Listen carefully, hear with your heart and savor the tune.

Savor the Season! Embrace the moments!  

The new year will come with its demanding schedule, list of responsibilities, and new challenges.  But for now, pause with me to enjoy this season of celebration!  Enjoy the reminder that God loved you so much that He sent Jesus to earth to bring His Kingdom into our hopeless situation.  Thank Him for the blessings of breath in your lungs, food on your table, and sunshine each day. He’s a good, good Father!

Live Loved,

Please share your thoughts in the reply box!

Life Happens

Posted on by
Reply

As my daughter and I snuggled together for a bedtime chat, she shared some of her “adulting” struggles, needs, and frustrations.  My silent tears filtered into her hair as I said, “I wish I could make things easier for you.”  Her response was so quintessentially her… “If life was easy, then I wouldn’t be the strong person I need to be.  But (insert a sigh here) I wish things could be easier too.”  I heard the tears in her voice. I did what my Mama’s heart knew to do, held her tight and whispered encouragement. Together, we laid our burdens at the feet of the One who told us not to worry about tomorrow.  But still, my heart ached for all she was facing.

Do you ever feel like that blow-up boxing toy that gets hit and keeps coming back for more? Sometimes life is just hard.  There’s no pat answers; pretty platitudes don’t make it better.  Easy fixes are a rarity and it’s a lot easier to plop down and whine than stand strong and throw some smack talk at your circumstances!  It’s in those turn-tail-and-run moments that I need to be held… Held by the One who could take away my struggles, but knows that enduring them will make me stronger.

 

The Lord takes no delight in watching us struggle with life.  His heart breaks when we reap pain from the choices we make or others make for us.  He grieves with us when the blows of circumstances sideswipe normalcy.  How He longs to draw us into His embrace and allow His peace and comfort to flow into all the rough and hurting places in our heart.   Matthew 11:28 encourages us, “So everyone, come to me! Are you weary, carrying a heavy burden? Then come to me. I will refresh your life, for I am your oasis.” (TPT)

The Lord, however, does take delight in watching us grow and thrive as a result of being willing to journey through those difficult places.  He will hold us and allow His tears to mingle with ours as we press on.  When we walk through the valley of the shadow of death, He is there and His light will lead us out!  It’s not easy; but it will be worth it.

You might feel tired, depleted, and on the verge of knockout.  But…

Don’t stay in the valley~~~~keep walking!

Don’t plop down in despair~~~~rise in determination!

Don’t journey alone~~~~align yourself for success!

Life happens… sometimes it’s amazing and sometimes it’s not.  So, if it’s not, take heart… you’re not in the final chapter.  My Father says that all the events of my life will work together for good because I love Him and He has a purpose for me! (Romans 8:28) The same goes for you… So, if It’s not good, it’s not over yet!

 

Stand strong!  Throw some smack talk back at your circumstances!  Remind them that God has good plans for you!  He treasures you! He likes you, He really likes you!

Dear Father, Bless this reader, I pray.  Strengthen them where they feel weak, guide them where they feel unsure, heal their hurting places.  Restore and refresh them with the joy of knowing they are deeply loved and created for amazing purposes!  Be their Daddy, their Champion, their Counselor, their Provider, their Healer, and the Keeper of their heart.  Thank You, Faithful Father!  In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Dive Deeper: Psalm 37:3-9, Psalm 103, Ephesians 3:14-21

Live Loved,

Please share your thoughts by clicking on the bubble by the title or in the reply box below!  Thank you!

 

 

 

 

Dare to be Different!

Posted on by
1

Going against the flow is intimidating for most people.  It’s much easier to ride the waves of the norm and “fit in” with what’s expected. But rarely do we grow… or shine… when we’re in that mode.  Stretching ourselves is a challenge, yet it can bring great rewards!  Not only will we find that doors of opportunity open but we blaze pathways of confidence for our future selves and those who watch our lives.

That’s not to say that there won’t be failures.  Sometimes taking risks causes painful results.  It’s part of the journey.  Speaking up against a bully, literally or figuratively, can result in a sock to the nose!  Yet, if we don’t take a stand for what we believe, we risk living a wishy-washy whiny existence that’s wrapped in dissatisfaction.

How can you stretch yourself… just a bit today or this week?

For me, it was entering a chili competition. This was out of character for me as I generally avoid anything that smacks of competition (aside from a good game of Dominoes!).  Though I enjoy cooking, I don’t consider myself a “foodie.”  But since this was a church event and we were raising money for the youth, I threw myself into it.

The result: I won!

 

I created my own version of chili and called it “Pittsburgh Comfort Chili.”  I stretched my creative muscles and came up with a unique black and gold dish that was hearty and satisfying!  I have to admit that winning my cute little Chili Cook-off trophy and hearing the compliments was rather exciting!  (Side note: Kudos to all the entrants at Freedom International Church as there were many unique yummy ones and the youth definitely benefitted!)   This risk paid off!

What about you?  How do you see yourself going against the norm for the good?  Could it be speaking up when your co-workers are trashing a peer?  Maybe it’s speaking out against an intense book that your middle schooler is expected to read. Possibly, your risk might be encouraging someone who is consistently rude to you.  How about buying the lunch of someone who is behind you in a line?  Today, I watched a 3rd grader share something with another student who had been tormenting him just an hour before.  Doing the unexpected or unprecedented is not an easy choice.  But it may be one that brings success, confidence, and a deep satisfaction that you stepped out and stepped up your game.  It may lead to the extraordinary!

My beliefs about who I am impact how I choose to live.  I Corinthians 2:16 reminds me that I have the mind of Christ.  Genesis 1:26 declares that I’m made in the likeness of God.  I’m wonderfully and uniquely created according to Psalm 139:14. I Peter 2:9 in The Passion Translation says this: “But you are God’s chosen treasure—priests who are kings, a spiritual “nation” set apart as God’s devoted ones. He called you out of darkness to experience His marvelous light, and now He claims you as His very own. He did this so that you would broadcast His glorious wonders throughout the world.”

I’ve been designed to stand up and stand out!  Not to attract attention to myself, but to impact the world around me for good!  When the air feels heavy with death, I will speak life.  When darkness feels pervasive, I will shine light.  When best intentions drag from discouragement, I will build confidence.  I will go against the status quo to make my world a better place.  The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is the extra we put into it!  I hope my kids are watching… I want them to be trail blazers too!

Dive Deeper: Psalm 139, Ephesians 2:10

Recipe: Pittsburgh Comfort Chili

Please share your thoughts by clicking on the bubble by the title!

Live Loved,

You are Enough!

Posted on by
5

 

You are enough!  Yes, you, the one reading this… a unique, divinely created, inspiring, talented person!  The world has a one-of-a-kind spot that was designed for you alone!  And you are enough… right now, just as you are… to fill it!

 

 

You were born with an innate sense of worthiness!  Who took it away?  At what point did your 4-year-old “I can conquer the world” confidence begin to dwindle?  Who convinced you that you don’t measure up?

Most likely it wasn’t a “who,” but rather a series of events or experiences that compounded through the years, sending you a message that you eventually believed.  You… and I… came to the conclusion that we are not enough.  We are not worthy of just being loved and accepted.  We have decided that we need to do more, be more, give more, and change more in order to be enough.

We’ve fallen victim to a lie!

In reality, you and I were created in the very image and exact likeness of the God of the Universe!  He created us and blessed us!  He gave us dominion over the earth.  He looked at us, His creation, and said that we were very good!  He lovingly crafted us to look like Him, to reflect His nature, His character, His integrity, His worth.   We are worthy of being loved because God deemed it so!  He IS love and created us to be love as well!

Our worth is not found in what we do, but rather in who we are and Whose we are.  We are creations, images even, of the Living God!  It’s time that we look in the mirror and see what the Creator sees! No matter the journey life takes us on, the mistakes we make, the hurts we endure…  we will always be made in the image of God, His creations and reflections!  Nothing can change that!

God is perfect!  And we are not.  That truth exists as well.  But it is not to be the basis upon which our worth is determined.  Why can I so confidently declare this truth?  Because I know that Jesus willingly gave Himself up for me… He.loves.me.THAT.much!

In fact, Hebrews 12:2 says this: “for the joy set before Him, He {Jesus} endured the cross.”  What was that joy?  I believe it was two-fold… the privilege to do the will of the Father and the knowledge that by His sacrifice, all mankind, present, past, & future could be reconciled to our Creator!

As Jesus walked the rocky road to Calvary, dragging the roughly hewn cross, He was not focused on the pain He was enduring.  His mind searched through the haze of blood for the eyes of the ones for whom He was giving His life!  His eyes saw through the ages, capturing snapshots of you and me!  WE are the joy for which He endured the cross! 

Jesus’ loving heart as portrayed by Bruce Marchiano

You are enough! Had you been the only fallen soul on earth, Jesus would still have endured the cross for you alone!  He would have given it all for me alone! Oh, to be able to wrap my mind around that truth!  How could I not love the One who has loved me since before time began?  The One who lovingly crafted me in His likeness?  My heart is captured by His grace and passion for me!  I am enough!  You are enough!

Dive deeper: Hebrews 12:1-2, I John 4:7-21, Isaiah 62:3-5

Lord, I pray that each person reading these words would feel Your loving presence right now!  Embrace them with Your all consuming love and whisper your delight in their ears!  Enable them to grasp the knowledge that they are lovable and worthy of love! Take them deeper in their relationship with You so that Your love will surround them and flow through them!

Thank You, Jesus!

Live Loved… because you truly are!

Please click on the bubble by the title to share your thoughts!

Recalculating Route…

Posted on by
1

Modern technology has left me asking more times than not… how did we ever manage before this came along?  A trip to an unknown destination is made much easier by the use of GPS system!  Of course, even the best-planned course can run into errors, snafus, and detours.  Then come those words that bring calm into the confusion, “Recalculating route.”

Life is full of unknown destinations!  When we think we know the route, suddenly, we are presented with a change in course!  Maybe your wrong turn came as a result of a poor choice you made.  Maybe the detour was the fault of someone else’s decision.  Or that abrupt shift was simply the reality of life happening to you.

We’ve all been there.

As we sit at the corner of Upset Street and Wrong Way Boulevard, we throw our hands up in despair!  “What now?!?” we exclaim in agitation and even fear.  This is not how we’d planned it!!  This wasn’t supposed to happen!  God, why did you let this happen?

 

And with that statement, we hit the very heart of our dilemma.  If God is good… if God is watching over us… why did this happen? 

I’m sorry to say that I have no easy answer to this.  In fact, I think most times there is no easy answer.  We live in a fallen world shaped by the sin, sickness, and the pain of free choice.  God allows that pain to touch our lives during different seasons.  We don’t have to understand God’s ways or the whys in order to choose to trust Him.  It’s a dilemma as old as mankind: Fear vs. Faith.  Will we whine, complain, worry, demand, manipulate, and rage… or will we rest in the faith that God is in control?  Will we tap into the truth that God authentically, deeply, unconditionally loves us?  Will we take comfort in knowing He journeys through the valley with us?

When our Heavenly Father knew you and I in the womb of our mother, when He wove us together in intricate beauty, He knew the route He had laid out for our lives.  He also knew each detour, wrong turn, and pitfall that we would face.  He does not exclaim in shock when you turn left instead of right!  He does not gasp in fear when I ignore a bridge and choose a side road instead.  He does not throw His hands up in terror when someone sideswipes us.  He reaches down in love, wraps us in His arms, and waits… He waits for us to turn to Him with the questions in our eyes.  He waits for us to find our equilibrium.  He waits for us to ask Him, “What now, Daddy?”  Then He assures our hearts with the simple words, “Recalculating Route!”

Nothing takes our Dad by surprise!  He knows what we will encounter and when. God understands the pain, abandonment, loss, and longing.  And He patiently provides us with a re-route when we are ready to trust His plans for us.  I’m convinced that He is trustworthy!  When loss impacts our dreams, He is not lost!  When confusion muddles once clear plans, He is not confused! When failure marks the precious relationships in our lives, He will not fail us!  When we submit our lives… the good, the bad, and the ugly parts to Him… He will cause all of it to come together for our good.  Why?  Because we love Him and He loves us!  (Romans 8:28)  It’s that difficult and that simple.

Dive Deeper: Jeremiah 17:7-8, Genesis 45:3-8

Declaration:  Heavenly Father, You are so faithful, even when I am faithless!  Thank you for being trustworthy!  Forgive me for the times I’ve gone astray and made choices that took me off the route You had planned for me.  Help me to forgive others who have failed me.  I ask You to take all of the failures, hurts, and disappointments… mold them into the plan for good that You have for me!  Even when adversity comes, I pray that I would hear and obey Your voice behind me saying, “This is the way.” (Isaiah 30:19-21)  Thank you, Daddy!  I love You!!

Share your thoughts by clicking on the bubble beside the title!

Live Loved,

Excerpted from “Reflections from the Valley” by Joy Morey

To Hope Again…

Posted on by
6

This week was a rough one at school.  Each passing year seems to bring us an increase of defiance and a decrease of initiative. The deep emotional, educational, and physical needs of our students overwhelm their desire for knowledge and hinder their ability to learn.   Our administrators have more need of running shoes than fashionable heels.  And the teachers… we wear exhaustion and discouragement like a water-logged cloak.

That was our week… and truth be told, we endure many weeks just like this.  At lunch, we share our war stories and roll our eyes at some of the funny and not-so-funny antics we’ve been forced to endure.  This week, like a dark stain, I felt their hopelessness—my hopelessness–creeping up to steal the breath from my typically resilient heart.

I wonder… is it worth it?  Will my efforts really impact the future?  Will the students understand all that I’m trying to share through my words, my attitude, my compassion?  Will any of what I am teaching really translate to a positive future for them?  I wonder…

What about you?  Have you wondered if what you are doing matters? Does your hard work seem hopeless?  Do you feel like giving up? Has your sense of confidence been slipping?  Do you, like me, wonder if we are just plodding up the same hill again and again with no signs of successfully reaching the other side?

 

As I wondered…  these are the words I felt God whisper into my heart:

Don’t become weary of doing what is good… there will be a harvest if you don’t give up! (see Galatians 6:9)

 

Like a breath of fresh air, I felt hope rush in!  Sowing and reaping is a natural law! When I sow into the next generation, there will be a harvest!  Just like a farmer, my sowing requires steadfastness, consistency, and commitment.  I’m “planting” life and truth through my words and actions and I can be confident that good is going to come as a result.  The best part is that I don’t have to do this alone! The Holy Spirit functions as a coach, shouting encouragement from the sidelines and strategically aligning others to work along with me.

It’s time to hope again!  Whatever struggles are sapping your energy and peace, it’s time to refocus the eyes of your heart! Whatever your career path, whomever your life impacts, do it for the glory of God and go full tilt knowing that you will harvest great rewards!  Refuse to give up or back down!  After all, you and I, we are not quitters!

Stand strong, leaning into the voice of the One who created you to excel!  It is through His instruction that we find our footing.  It is His grace that weaves through our actions the very fabric of hope that will bring us through the difficult days.  It will be worth it… and we will find out just how much… if we don’t give up!

As my feet hit the floor on Monday morning, my mind will ring out this anthem: “I am a prisoner of hope!  I refuse to give up!  I will see the goodness of the Lord in my life and world!”

Dive Deeper:  Psalm 27:13-14, Romans 5:1-5, Galatians 6:7-10

Please share your thoughts by clicking on the bubble beside the title!

Live Loved,

 

 

 

Standing in the Storm

Posted on by
1

“Therefore, put on the complete armor of God, so that you will be able to [successfully] resist and stand your ground in the evil day [of danger], and having done everything [that the crisis demands], to stand firm [in your place, fully prepared, immovable, victorious.]” Ephesians 6:13 AMP

As the crisis of Hurricane Irma bears down on us, the manic news reports flash everywhere and the panicked purchasers wipe the shelves clean of storm necessities.  Before long, even the calmest person can feel the rise of stress and worry choking out the confidence that God truly is in control.

As I struggled with this rising fear of calamity, I felt the Lord whisper in my ear, “Having done all else, stand firm.”  Just minutes ago, my family and I walked around our property, declaring trees will stay put, commanding angels to stand guard over board-less windows, speaking a shield over our vehicles, and praying a hedge of safety around our chickens.   Now, I sit here, truly having done all I can think of and can manage to do with what limited supplies are available.

Breathing deeply, I choose to embrace peace that passes all understanding.  My confidence is not in my preparations or the piles of supplies.  My confidence is in my Faithful Father.  He has promised me that no matter what comes my way, He will cause all my life’s circumstances~the good, the bad, and the ugly~ to flow together for my good because I love Him and He loves me!

Standing firm is not a passive stance that bears the lackadaisical attitude of an amusement park attendee.  Rather, it is a purposeful stand.  When we stand firm, we stand in expectancy.  We stand ready.

There is purpose and power in our stand.  We stand on truth, we stand in hope, and we stand believing that God’s Kingdom will come and His will be done in our current situation.  This faith stand declares emphatically that we trust our Dad… No.Matter.What!

In our lives, storms will come!   Isaiah 43 reminds us:

“But now, this is what the Lord says—
He who created you, Jacob,
He who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are Mine.
2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze”

Note this: When you pass through the waters… when you walk through the fire… it’s not a question of if, but when.

Your storm may seem overwhelming right now… turn to Him.  Grab ahold of His beard and look deep into His eyes!  He loves you.  When you climb into His arms, you will find that deep inner peace your heart desires!  In fact, you will find yourself planted right smack in the center of where God wanted you to be!  His plans are never to harm us; rather, His plans our purposefully and intricately woven to give us an incredible future!

Let the storm rage around you!  But stand firm in the knowledge that God, your God, is in control.  Wait in expectancy and hope for Him to give you strength and direction.  Stand declaring His goodness and faithfulness.  Watch Him come through for you with His mighty right hand!  He loves you SO MUCH that He will work on your behalf when you submit your life to Him.

Dig deeper:  Jeremiah 29:11-13, Ephesians 6:10-20

Please share your thoughts by clicking on the bubble beside the title!

Live Loved,                    

Reduce, Reuse and… Upcycle?

Posted on by
Reply

“I shall not die, but live, And declare the works of the Lord.” Psalm 118:17

Make a lamp from a broken table, create a roof out of plastic bottles, shape a Thai coconut into a plant holder…  all projects that fall under the umbrella of upcycling.  Upcycling is taking unwanted or wasted materials and converting them into a useful, beneficial product.  I confess to catching a bit of the fever.  I’ve turned thrift shop t-shirts into trendy scarves and old crates into an eye-pleasing display shelf.  It was in the middle of a Pinterest scavenger hunt that the Lord began to speak to me about His version of upcycling.

He reminded me of a conversation I had been having with a friend earlier that day.  We had been talking about life’s ups and downs.  She had stated that one of her family’s mantras is “No wasted pain.”  As soon as that phrase left her lips, it took root in my heart.  We ALL have endured painful circumstances!  No one is exempt. How can it be used… upcycled to become something purposeful?

Painful experiences can reduce us to broken, useless vessels. They can cause us to reuse past experiences as excuses to stay in a broken state. Or past pain can be upcycled and used to benefit others!  You see, my friend, as children of the King, we are more than survivors… we are thrivers!  We can take the painful blows we’ve been dealt and lay them at the feet of our Savior!  As we walk humbly before Him, seek forgiveness and healing, as we trust His work in our lives…  we build a testimony!  Step by step, we move forward into healing and victory!  Then, the “WOW” factor is when we begin to share the witness of how God brought us that healing, restoration, provision, and vision in spite of our painful circumstance!  When we submit ourselves (all the mistakes, hurt, betrayal, anger, & fear) to Him and His ways, He upcycles this “junk” and creates a work of art… a Testimony of His goodness and mercy!

Declaration:
Lord, I don’t want to waste the pain I’ve had to walk through!  Help me to stay close to Your heart, listening, obeying, healing, so that this struggle can be upcycled for Your Kingdom and glory!  Thank You that You love me and are a Faithful Father!

Dig Deeper: Mark 5:25-34, Genesis 50:20, Revelation 12:11

Please share your thoughts by clicking on the bubble next to the title!

Live Loved,

Riding the Waves of Grief

Posted on by
Reply

Grief is an unpredictable animal at best…     a ferocious storm at worst.

the_loss_by_whiluna-d9h0l0s

When we think we’ve tamed it, it figures out a way to blindside us in a moment that’s completely inconvenient!

Most people, whether they know it or not, are in some stage of grief resulting from a life experience. Though the death of a loved one is the most obvious cause of grief, there are a myriad of losses that can bring about the need to walk through the grieving process. Consider these:

  • the loss of a dream
  • the loss of a childhood
  • the loss of a marriage
  • the loss of a valued relationship
  • the loss of a business
  • the loss of innocence
  • the loss of a sense of security
  • the loss of hope
  • the loss of financial stability
  • the loss of precious time
  • the loss of memories or memorabilia
  • the loss of health
  • the loss of a home
  • the loss of respect

I’m sure you can think of more as you consider your own experiences. Experts on grief suggest that there are five stages in the grieving process:

stages-of-grief

Each person is different and the process can repeat through multiple cycles with some stages lasting much longer than others.1

There’s no “cure” for grief. You see, it’s not an illness or a handicap or an “issue,” it’s a natural process.

So how do we muddle through? I’m sure there are many wise and helpful suggestions; but here, I simply offer my own takeaways from walking the pathway of grief:

*Lean into the pain~We shy away from “letting our grief go” because we are afraid it will consume us! But it won’t. Your tears will dry and you’ll pick yourself up to move on with your day. When you feel the urge to cry again, find a safe place and get on with it. Your heart needs to grieve, your mind needs release, and your body needs the stress outlet. Just don’t stay there forever.

*Give yourself brain breaks~Read an entertaining book, watch a movie, take a walk, play solitaire, work out at the gym, have coffee with a friend… allow your mind to be distracted from the pain for awhile.

*Do not attempt to numb the pain~You’ll find yourself on a fast track to addiction. Instead, see above! (However, a little dark chocolate does a body good!)

*Grab the moments of joy~During this season, there may not be many of them… so laugh when the urge hits, giggle at a funny ad, catch a comedy, share a silly moment with someone you hold dear. Experiencing joy does not nullify your loss; it helps you cope with it.

*Surround yourself with trustworthy teammates~You’ll know who these people are and are not before long. Maybe you’ve heard of Aaron & Hur? While Joshua led the Israelites into battle, Moses stood at the top of a hill with his staff raised. As long as he kept his arms up, the Israelites were successful, but when his arms lowered, they began to lose. Aaron & Hur, found a rock for Moses to sit on, then they stood, one on each side, and held his arms up until the Israelites were victorious.2

Notice, they didn’t tell Moses what he should do, how to hold his staff, or what he should say! They went into teammate mode, stood strong beside him, and supported him in the heat of battle till victory broke through! Send the naysayers out of the room! Get rid of those who bring more negative than positive or who are unwilling to shoulder some of the weight of a heavy heart.  These people are toxic to your process.  Instead, look for those who will encourage you (without coddling), who will pray for you, and who are willing to bear some of the weight until you can stand up on your own!

*Dig deep and find the treasure of thankfulnessThankfulness~

Even in the darkest of moments, there are things to find that inspire thankfulness. Speak those treasures out loud so your ears can hear them and your mind will remember. Thankfulness turns our eyes outward instead of inward. A thankful heart brings emotional and physical health with it!

 

Grief can be much like the waves of the ocean… they come and go and what a ride we experience. But… you.will.survive! Yes, you will come through it! One day you’ll wake up and realize that the sun is a bit brighter, your heart is a bit lighter, and you see the world with more hope you’ve felt in a long time. It’s not that you’ve forgotten, but that you’ve embraced your new normal.

When that happens, be ready to share your journey with others. That’s how we survive, learn, and grow… by sharing our journey and living life together!

Live Loved,

1 Grief.com

2 The Bible: Exodus 17

Please share your thoughts by clicking on the bubble next to the title!

Are you experiencing grief? How can I pray for you today? Please write it in the comment section and I will agree with you!